Cycling helmets, jerseys, armwarmers...they're cyclists right?
Nope. God damned rollerbladers. Is this how the rest of the world sees cycling? If so, it's no wonder that the Federal Government is investigating Lance Armstrong and every other American cyclist from the last decade.
Two thoughts about commuting:
My bike's about to throw down
Like all of you, I've been called "Lance Armstrong" in a mocking tone far too many times by drivers and pedestrians alike. I've also been called many other things, but I would find it boring to share them with you. The ones that I do like to share are the slightly unusual comments I get from time to time. Riding to work last year, a car cut me off. I caught up with the guy a few blocks later as he parked on the side of the street. I was about to give him a bit of hell for cutting me off, when he yelled out "Man, you're gonna' catch a cold!" It was 30-something degrees (-1 Celsius or so) that day, and sunny. The man had voiced his concern about my health in the tone that a concerned parent would use. The guy looked like he was seriously worried about me. I didn't know what to make of it.
Similarly, I didn't know what to make of the angry SUV driver who got out of his large vehicle and challenged me to a fight one time by saying "F_ck you, you bike! Get the f_ck over here and fight me, you f_cking bike!" I distinctly heard him say "bike" and not "biker". As I rode away, I got the distinct feeling that it was my bike, not me, that he was angry at. Who knew that a tiny 52cm frame could get someone that worked up? I bet my bike could have totally kicked his sorry ass though.
Lastly, one of the comments I remember most happened during one of my rare outings with other people who ride bikes. That morning, a man waiting for the bus said something like "Are the buses running on time, or are the streets downtown closed off because of this bike race?" as we rode by. There was maybe 8 or 9 of us riding...but I guess to him, this looked like the Tour de France. Since in his eyes we were riding the Tour, I guess he thought that we (as the competitors) would be able to answer his questions about current street closures and traffic patterns. I wonder if professional riders get asked similar questions as they race. Come to think of it, getting out of the Roubaix velodrome was extremely tough this spring...I should have asked Cancellara for directions.
Spread the joy, however little of it there may be to go around
We are all fond of sharing horror stories about riding our bikes. The car that almost hit you, the idiot who yelled out, and got out of the car to fight you. These things make riding less fun, but we seem to relish telling others (whether they ride or not) about them. I get it. But what about sharing stories about the people who are kind to you while you ride? I know you may not have many stories like this, but maybe we should all dwell on those upbeat moments as much as we do on the bad ones. The old man who waits for the bus on my route to work, and lifts up his fist as he cheers me on. The lady who rolled down her window and kindly said she admired me for riding to work. These moments may not be as plentiful, but when they happen to you, remember them and share them with others.
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Remember the caption contest, which can earn you an autographed copy of the Bike Snob book. See this post for details.
You make a good point and I have talked about this with friends and co-workers before. I always have bad stories from the road.
ReplyDeleteEspecially where other cyclist are involved.
I can't change other peoples crummy behavior by retuning it to them so I keep smiling and waving or giving the nod. I'm not going to be a bummer on the bike on a beautiful day. I've already been that guy, for a long time I might add, and there are tons of them now. So it's my turn to throw some smiles around and hopefully balance out someone else's bummer in motion. At least that's how I see it these days.
Lucho - I hope my last comment wasn't too over the top. I just never hear anyone else voice a similar perspective on the microcosm of competitive cycling and got excited.
Anyway bieks 'r fun and I can't figure out why people who don't enjoy them get so involved with it all.
Wait,what happened to the last post? Then you do my head in with the roller bladers...WTF?
ReplyDeleteWhat happened to the cro mags interview?
ReplyDeleteThat was rad.
Also, whenever i crash, it's always old ladies that help me. So embarrassing, yet kind.
I live in London, and although I'm generally very easy going, cycling in this city does turn me into an angry man sometimes. However, most days it is great to be out there, and on a training ride around Regent's Park on Sunday morning, another cyclist told me he liked my bike. That made my day no end.
ReplyDeleteBest Come-back I've heard to an angry motorist...Jesus loves you man!
ReplyDeleteWorked so well I use it often now! Catches the motorist way off guard!
Best one I EVER got was a few weeks ago. I shared it on my Twitter, but an older black gentleman dressed as an 80's pimp yelled "Modern day cowboy!" as I passed by. I nearly crashed I was laughing so hard!
ReplyDeleteI've been called "hippie", too. In full tight cycling gear on a road bike, with a helmet, I look like a hippie? My how things have changed!
Ditto on the Cro-Mags post. Where did it go? Maybe it disappeared along with Australia's pride after Germany SPANKED them. Ooooooh!!!!
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if people give me the finger or something, i sometimes blow kisses at them. i'm not always that controlled but i try.
ReplyDeletejim,
i'm not sure what comment you're referring to. sorry, i suck. don't worry.
regarding the interview with john, it was taken down at his request. working with him to have it back up soon. stay tuned. sorry.
I've had lots of weird interactions with motorists and pedestrians. One time I was waiting at a redlight and standing in the crosswalk, waiting for traffic on a main feeder street to clear so I could jump the red. A school bus on the main road started to turn left onto the street that I was on and I had to walk backwards out of the crosswalk to give the bus enough clearance to make the turn. It was awkward for bus and me.
ReplyDeleteA conversion/work van with two yokel types stopped on the main street saw all this happening and one of them called me a MFer and for me to get out of the road. I became enraged like the Hulk. I started yelling at the guys to get out of the van and say it to my face. I then rode across the street yelling at them "to step." Whatever that means. I think the sight of a guy in really colorful skintight clothing on a bicycle looking for a confrontation was a bit much for them to handle so they drove off. I'd like to think all the cyclists they would encounter in the future would be treated with kid gloves, lest they again be yelled at.
I've had lots of good interactions. Cars full of girls have complimented me on my legs, people have stopped by to ask if I need a ride if I'm out fixing a flat, and I've been driven home by a good Samaritan when he saw me struggling to ride after crashing in a gravelly corner while on a solo training ride in the middle of nowhere.
I think most people are genuinely kind toward cyclists. It's the 1% that aren't that are so frustrating and depressing.
Zach....car full of girls. I know that well. why does it hurt SO much more when its young girls who make fun of you? I wish I knew.
ReplyDeleteLucho.
ReplyDeleteSwankybianchi here from ye olde North West England.
On my bike at a crossroads at a nearby village waiting for my cycle mates to turn up. I was on my Trek which had US Postal decals, I was also wearing a US Postal top.
Old guy walking his dog stopped to chat, he says " nice bike... US Postal Service huh... that's a big post round you've got there" then he walked away leaving me chuckling to myself.
Another time I was on 'The Cat & Fiddle Challenge' 55 mile sponsored event with some mates, over some steep climbs in Derbyshire / Staffordshire. I was really struggling up one of the steepest climbs near the finish when a young lady cycled up beside me and checked out my bike. She asked "have you got a granny ring on there?" breathlessly I answered
ReplyDelete"No, no granny"
she said
"Well, you should have!"
and rode off leaving me for dead.
My mates pissed themselves when they heard
To this day, when they see me struggling, they ride up and say "Have you got a granny on that?
Ha Ha Ha"
Never lived it down.
Oh, yeah, I've gotten "nice legs", too, but usually from older women! Hahaha. It's flattering, I must admit, no matter who the compliment comes from.
ReplyDeleteI've thought about scrapping with motorists before. I can hold my own in a fight and have been in enough to know what I'm doing, but the problem when I'm riding is the shoes. I'm always afraid I won't be able to get enough grip with the cleats to grab someone by the back of the neck and break their face with my forehead (why do you think they call me "SkullKrusher"? It sure as hell NOT 'cuz my retarded climbing abilities). Another good thing to consider is putting your bike down and basically leaving it unattended while you fight. If the other guy has a friend, he'd be a dumb-ass not to take it, or throw it onto incoming traffic. I've thought about this a lot, as you can see.
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When I ride to work I usually cross over the Williamsburg Bridge into Manhattan. In the morning there are always Hasidic women exercising by walking back and forth over the bridge, usually in groups of 2 or 3. As you may have heard from one of the other top 50 most influential cycling blogs on the intertubes, the relationship between the Hasidim and the Lycra crowd isn't always copacetic, and can be downright contentious, if not merely mutually nonplussed. But there is one Hasidic woman - always walking alone - who never fails to smile, wave, and sometimes even say hello. Doesn't matter if we are moving in the same direction or not - she always looks up and smiles. Kinda feels like the peaceable kingdom for a brief moment. Oh yeah, and the traffic cops on the Manhattan side of the bridge are always a riot to talk to - I think they are so used to having hostility directed at them they really open up when someone takes the time to chat...
ReplyDeleteI like when I'm pounding down an urban street and a car will pull up and pace me.
ReplyDeleteA few times girls have gotten really excited, screaming out everytime I would pass a speed... "28, 29, 30, 31 miles per hour, OMG!!! Can I have your number"?
just noticed that the rollerblader in the white jersey is wearing Team CSC gloves... lulz.
ReplyDeleteI once shoulder barged a guy who was having a conversation with his buddy in the bike lane.
ReplyDeleteMan, those two guys could run FAST. They caught me bay the back of the jersey and were going to work me over good, but a tiny, 90 year old guy came over and moderated a peacefull settlement. I just had to apologise.
Cheers Lucho. I've got some I.C backtracking to do. Hope the last ten posts are up to snuff.
Baked Ben.
ReplyDeleteall last ten posts are guaranteed to be great or your money back.
Down here in the South we get vicious thunderstorms during the summers that show up quickly.
ReplyDeleteRiding home one day I got caught in a severe storm that had several inches of water on the road in a few minutes and so really bad lightning and wind. In 15 minutes on a lightly travelled road I had four people come alongside, roll down their windows, and offer me a ride home. One lady drove off when I declined and then circled back a few minutes later to make sure I was OK.